this is so incredibly important to me holy shit
an article about an agender person’s identity ON THE FRONT PAGE OF THE WASHINGTON POST
FRONT AND CENTER!!!!!
AGHAFDHF!! SJFGSJS!! JSHFKA!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME
this kind of visibility is excellent, but I’m curbing my enthusiasm until I can read the article. :/
They mention the pronouns Ze, Xe, Ou, and Ey. This is awesome.
What I love about this article is that at no point does the writer gender Kelsey at all. Monica Hesse managed to write the article without using any pronouns to refer to Kelsey at all - that’s freaking HARD TO DO if you’re not used to it.
What an awesome thing.
What? My boobs are great.
See? Perfectly fine.
I mean, yeah, they jiggle and wobble and don’t sit high up on my chest. But that’s normal.
Like what do you think I should do about it? I mean
My boobs just do normal boob things. They’re A-okay normal healthy boobs.
Moral: Boobs are really diverse. Do your boobs sag? Normal. Do they have hair? Normal. Do they have stretch marks? Normal. Do you get pimples on them? Normal. Are they different sizes? Normal. Big nipples? Normal. Puffy dark areola? Normal. Not facing dead ahead? Normal. Small? Normal. Big? Normal. Normal Normal Normal.
And they’re your boobs. If you can change any of those things and you want to, go ahead!
But don’t let people tell you that your breasts are wrong just because they’re affected by gravity.
You’re fine. They’re fine.
This may be the best thing I see all day.
"The Queen of Rap, slaying with Queen Bey!"
I’M HAVING A HEART ATTACK AND A COUPLE OF LIGHT STROKES
My anaconda will consider it
My anaconda has, upon review of the information presented with it’s partners, decided that it, in fact, does not. My anaconda apologizes for any inconvenience this may cause and thanks you for your time.
Can we please stop pretending it’s less important than all the other -isms?
i’ve gotten more crap for my autism than for being queer. more bullying, more shit talk, more exclusion, more dehumanizing — and WAY more trouble with employment and housing. ableism is a bigger problem than homophobia. surprising? that’s because people aren’t talking about it!
violence against disabled people is unbelievably common. i don’t want to start comparing it numerically with violence against women and racial minorities, because that might imply i don’t take the latter seriously. don’t get me wrong; those hate crimes are super awful and we need to make them stop. however i need to say this: my dash was 80% ferguson for at least a week after mike brown was shot, but i see at least a couple stories every month about autistics being murdered by their caregivers, by their schools, by police who interpereted a nonverbal shutdown as resistance, and these stories seldom get more than 100 notes.
please, folks, i know you care about people, i know you care about me, and i know you care about justice. please pay more attention to ableism. this is a huge civil rights issue.
i don’t mean the dumb sjw thing where people star out words like ‘crazy’ or call ‘ablesim’ on shit that is not ableism, btw. i definitely don’t mean the thing where my reclamatory usage of ‘sperglord’ and the like sets the whole parrot tree screeching. i mean stuff like sheltered workshops where it’s legal to pay disabled people less than a dollar an hour. i mean accessibility, i mean acceptance. i mean the thing where the discussion about autsim is led by a hate group that wants to eliminate our existence. i mean stop the violence.
In addition to the many autistic people who have been murdered by caregivers (and then, even scarier, the general public says that’s so sad, they might have done the same thing if they were that poor, overworked mother…), there is the pervasive problem of disabled people being discriminated against by the medical establishment.
Doctors routinely underestimate quality of life of disabled people and advise them—on the basis of inconvenience, not on the basis of any physical pain they might be feeling—to end their lives (see http://www.notdeadyet.org/ for an advocacy group devoted to protecting disabled people from coercive assisted suicide, such as doctors in some jurisdictions being allowed to suggest suicide without having to mention the existence of accommodations for a person’s conditions). In the US, in places where this is legal at all the doctor has to make a good-faith prediction that the person would die within six months anyway, but there are countries in Europe that are less restrictive in this regard, or that have no such restriction at all. (Belgium allows euthanasia even in non-terminal patients, and euthanasia—as opposed to assisted suicide—doesn’t even require the patient to be conscious or otherwise capable of giving consent as long as they have consented at some point in the past. Keep in mind that most people who want to attempt suicide change their mind at the slightest hindrance, intervention, or change in situation or mood—and that many people, upon becoming suddenly disabled, are briefly suicidal but almost all of them get over it after a month or two when they’ve had time to adjust—so if this sort of thing is to be even remotely ethical it has to involve consent at the moment before death.) Furthermore, there are tons of cases of families and friends pressuring disabled people into suicide. This can range from them saying they’d kill themselves if they were in the disabled person’s situation (despite there being several research studies saying that abled people, including doctors, vastly underestimate quality of life of disabled people, compared to what the disabled people themselves report feeling) to outright telling the disabled person they’re a burden.
The medical establishment also routinely obstructs treatment of disabled people. If a person is disabled they are unlikely to be able to get an organ transplant, for example—even if it’s for an unrelated condition—because they are considered low priority patients (see, e.g., http://www.cnn.com/2013/11/30/health/disabled-transplants/ especially the parts about studies of hospitals in general). And in some cases doctors will outright refuse even more basic medical care for disabled people, who then have to actually sue to get the life-saving care they need. The doctors base this, again, on their assessment of the disabled person’s quality of life, not on the disabled person’s own assessment.
I can’t add everything I’d want to say right now because I’m exhausted and stressed. But I deal with multiple oppressions on a regular basis, and it always amazes me that people who are otherwise committed to social justice always seem to rank ableism so low on the scale of Bad Things. Because ableism is the thing that keeps almost killing me. Not that other isms haven’t almost killed me, but ableism is the one that does so with the most consistency and forcefulness. And yet I’ve actually heard people say things like “Does ableism even really count?” and “Disabled people are just trying to jump on the oppression bandwagon and imitate people of color and act like they’re all oppressed and stuff, but they’re really not” and other things along those lines. Not to mention the thing where ableism is tacked on as an afterthought, and it’s always a list of words not to say. As if it’s the words that are trying to kill us.
I deal, regularly, with ableism, homophobia, transphobia, sizeism, classism, and sexism. And while all of these things can be literally deadly serious, somehow it’s ableism and classism that are the most dangerous to me on an ongoing basis. (And if I were a person of color I’m certain racism would be up there with them.) And that’s something I hear pretty consistently from people who face multiple oppressions, that even when ableism isn’t the worst, it’s always up there among the worst on a personal level for that person. I will never say that any particular oppression is always the worst for everyone, because that’s not how oppression works. Each person experiences oppression differently because of where we’re situated in society. But pretty consistently ableism, classism, and racism come up as the worst for an awful lot of people dealing with multiple oppressions, and yet somehow people who don’t actually have to face significant ableism, always forget ableism, or even belittle it.
I imagine there are disabled people who don’t face super-significant ableism, but when we do… it’s bad. Like really bad. Like I don’t know why I’m still alive, bad. I literally don’t know how I’ve survived the ableism that’s been thrown at me throughout my life, I’ve had so many opportunities to die of it and I have managed to live so far. But to some people, ableism is just a list of words not to say. And that astounds me.
For me, ableism is being told I shouldn’t get a feeding tube because it’d be better to die of aspiration pneumonia or starvation than it would be to eat through a plastic tube in my side. Ableism is having people not work as hard to save my life as they would a nondisabled cis person with money (and yes I think ableism, classism, and transphobia tend to meld together in my life at times, they’re not neatly separable… being poor and somewhat gender-ambiguous-looking and developmentally disabled meld together in people’s minds to make me into a thing, an unperson). Ableism is being so weak that I’m lying in my own shit while people argue about whether I should be “allowed” to shit the bed, because if you let a developmentally disabled person shit the bed they might not ever want to use a toilet again — while nobody worried at all about why I was suddenly shitting the bed after years of never ever doing so, and nobody thought maybe I belonged in the ICU, or anything like that. (My doctor today says I absolutely belonged in the ICU. Unfortunately he wasn’t on duty when this was happening.)
(Yes, I bring that story up a lot, because I still have trouble believing that in the middle of an adrenal and/or myasthenia crisis, while I was lying in the hospital with pneumonia and too weak to roll myself over in bed, they were most worried about whether I’d get used to not using toilets. Oh and also they were massively bothered by the sound of me throwing up continuously for hours, they really didn’t like it, so they evacuated my room and shut the door and stopped answering my call bell so they wouldn’t have to hear it. Or see me getting so weak from using those muscles over and over that I was starting to have trouble breathing. Luckily I had a visitor, a friend’s caregiver, who had been a patient in that hospital before, whose response to all that was to throw my door open every time they shut it, and scream at the top of her lungs, “If you kill her, I will have every lawyer in town in this place!” Suddenly I got transferred to another ward and got a lot better care. Unfortunately I don’t remember a lot of details because by that point I was severely delirious. All I remember was her yelling that — and then my body disintegrating and flying out the window, or something else that didn’t really happen. I heard the full story much later.)
For me, ableism is every day, life and death, without fail. It’s not some kind of afterthought tacked onto the “real” oppressions. And it’s not a list of words. I mean yes there are ableist words, but there are classist words too, and yet people seem to be fully capable of comprehending that classism isn’t just a list of slurs and quasi-slurs and not-even-slurs-at-all. They don’t seem capable of comprehending that about ableism so easily.
Another big thing that no one ever points out, we can’t fight back either.
Disabled people as a group are defined by inability to do something, usually something decently important for functioning. A lot of us have issues with movement so we can’t really march, we have issues communicating to it’s hard to spread our messages, we have a harder time handling stress so arguments can lead to making ourselves sick, we have issues with stamina so we wear ourselves down quick.
Generally on tumblr people you see most groups want allies out of their movement entirely, but even if the reasons why are obvious, we do not always have the luxury of speaking for ourselves. We need the help.
Then the allies who are speaking for disabled people a lot of the time are doctors, caregivers, parents etc. who often have selfish motivations that can be more harm than good for us, and when bad allies talk over us we often get drowned out.
Activism is very hard. Both physically and mentally and when you are already literally going in with a handicap it’s even harder. But I rarely see people outside the immediate bubble of being disabled or close to people who are give a fuck.
i can’t go on marches unless they’re really really short. not everyone with mobility issues is “wheelchair-bound”. btw can we start saying “wheelchair user” instead? being paralyzed isn’t the only reason folks use one. sometimes standing/walking just hurts like hell.
i can’t go to rallies unless i clear my schedule for a week or two afterwards to do nothing but hide from the world until the autistic overload/shutdown goes away, and all i can do at those rallies is be a warm body pretty much. sensory processing issues are a bitch.
so for myself, i want to say: YES PLEASE ALLIES YES. don’t speak over us, don’t decide for us. but listen to our voices and amplify them. heed our decisions and help us enforce them. DISABILITY RIGHTS ALLIES, I LOVE YOU.
BEST PURCHASE IN THE HISTORY OF EVER
*excited umbrella-sword slashing*
in recent news I’ve been stopped by multiple security guards
All hail the brick-phone
I don’t know if any of you guys live in the area or even in the country but please share this.
My peer and friend Patrick Farnham has gone missing this morning and we’re all worried and keeping an eye out. Please notify the AFP or if you can’t then please give me the information so I can relay it to them. Please please please even just reblog so we can spread the message.
His friends and family all consider this to be extremely out of character, and are all very worried. Please reblog, the wider this spreads, the better.
you can just tell that Nicki Minaj is the kind of person that when you’re telling a story and everyone else in the group is talking over you, she’s making direct eye contact with you and paying extra attention so that you don’t get discouraged and stop mid-story
its really important for men to stand up to other men who say terrible and sexist shit
because sexist men dont listen to what women have to say
literally the most important thing men can do if they want to call themselves feminist allies